R's Birth Story

R was due April 13, 2008, but he arrived six days early. I had been dilated for five weeks, and with a prior premature birth; we had been expecting him for some time!

I had a doctor’s appointment on the morning of April 7, 2008. The doctor found that I was 5 cm dilated, 100% effaced, and my cervix was very soft and anterior. Things were ready to go! We had discussed scheduling her to break my bag of waters that Wednesday, but I decided against it opting to let nature take its course. Little did I know I wouldn’t make it through the day.

I returned home from the doctor around noon and rested for a while. Within half an hour, I felt an unfamiliar pain low in my abdomen and radiating down my legs. I had been having Braxton-Hicks or practice contractions for months, but this felt different. They were very short though and not very painful, so I wasn’t sure if this was the real thing. I showered and got completely ready for work. I called T and said I might be having contractions, but I wasn’t sure. They were a good ten minutes apart and short and easy, so it was just hard to tell.

Our childcare provider arrived, and I called T and asked him to come home, so we could decide what to do. We sat upstairs for a while and then decided to go into work. But, as I was sitting in the car, I had a feeling I should just stay home. T went in at 3:00 p.m., and I went upstairs to nap an hour or so and see if the contractions got stronger.

G, our childcare provider, kept the boys busy downstairs. When I woke up around 4:30, I started obsessively searching the Internet trying to figure out if these were labor contractions. After having a few false alarms, I wanted to be sure!

Shortly after 5:00 pm, the contractions jumped from ten minutes apart, to six, and then very quickly to two to three minutes apart. They got much more intense as well. I had to stop and wait for them to pass. I was finally convinced and called T around 5:30 to come home. I changed and quickly finished packing.

We talked to G and arranged for her to take Q for the night. We left the house shortly after 6:00 p.m. for the hospital. The car ride was uncomfortable, sitting in an awkward position, bumping along, with contractions coming every few minutes. Thankfully the drive was less than 15 minutes.

We pulled up between contractions at 6:30 p.m., so T parked the car, and I ran in. I talked to the nurses quickly explaining I only had a minute or two before the next one would hit. I sat on the couch breathing deeply while they readied a room for me.

The nurse didn’t seem to be in much of a hurry as she went through the routine to get me checked in. But, then she checked my cervix and found that I was 7-8 centimeters and my bag of waters was bulging. That kicked her into action, and she rushed around preparing for delivery. It wasn’t going to be long!

I had studied a program called “Hypnobabies” and was trying for a natural delivery, though I didn’t rule out an epidural if necessary. I had one when I delivered Q, though that was with the intense contractions Pitocin creates. So far, I was feeling okay and managing. Then as I moved into the transition phase around 7:00 p.m., the pain started getting very intense. My water broke in a gush, and I was clutching on to the side of the bed. I asked for pain medication, and they started to put in an IV, but by then I was ready to push, and it was too late. It was around 7:15, and there wasn’t even a doctor there! The on-call doctor had left, and they hadn’t yet been able to get a hold of my doctor. A midwife came in, and I started pushing. My doctor walked in a few minutes later and took over.

The pushing actually brought some relief. I didn’t feel that desperate pain from the transition phase, and I felt again that I could do it naturally not that I had a choice at that point!

I pushed for about 35 minutes or so. It seemed to take forever just to get him down in to position. There was a ton of pressure toward the end as he crowned, and I gave a powerful push and out he slipped at 7:54 pm! The doctor immediately plopped him on my belly, and it was a bit mind-boggling to think that wriggling thing had been living inside of me! We told the nurses his name, and they rubbed him to get a few good cries going.

He had a full cone-shaped head of dark hair and was healthy and vibrant at birth. It was a wonderfully different experience from delivering Q in the operating room and watching his unresponsive body being whisked immediately into the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. This experience felt much more celebratory rather than like an emergency.

R quickly took to nursing. With tiny Q, that was a struggle for weeks. R was a big guy at 8 pounds, 4 ounces, and 20.75 inches. His head was 14 inches around, a full inch larger than average. That helps to explain my third-degree tear (fourth degree is the worst). The doctor took quite awhile stitching me up. That was not my favorite part of the experience.

After a bath for both of us and a change of clothes, we moved into a room with a double bed. R was a great eater and rested peacefully. It was wonderful to welcome a healthy baby and to have him at our bedside. I have been taking painkillers for the severe cramping that accompanies nursing as your uterus gets back down to size and for the pain from my tear.

I feel strong and proud for making it through without any pain medication. I know women have been doing it for millennia, and I knew I could too, though I doubted myself right at the end. I was glad to experience it in all its raw pain and excitement, just as nature intended.

We are a lucky little family.

-MM