I have been feeling guilty lately. About every little thing. I am a pretty guilty person by nature, but lately I have just felt swamped in it.
I feel guilty about being at work instead of being with my babies. I feel guilty that I am not focused enough on work now that my family is larger. I feel guilty if I eat too much ice cream or skip my run. I feel guilty if I am late for an appointment. I feel guilty if I depend on my co-worker, so I end up just doing extra work. I feel guilty that I am not making T a priority.
I am driving myself crazy. I know all this guilt is misplaced, but I can't shake it. I tell T how I feel, and he doesn't feel the same. Even after a business trip or an especially long day, he doesn't waste a moment on guilt. I don't think I have struck the right balance in my life yet, and even that is making me feel guilty.
--MM
6 years ago
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3 comments:
You're still getting used to some pretty major life changes! Go easy on yourself. You have at least one more month before anyone expects you to be Super Mom.
I think being guilty is a fact of life for Mom's. From the moment you concieve the first one, you worry, "was that too many cups of coffee--did I run too much, not enough? am I discipling enough, not enough, am I pushing education enough/not enough." Believe me, I know what you mean. It's a constant guilt fest around here (for me--once again this seems to be gender specific). If you don't work you feel like you're not contributing to the household, but if I even skip a few hours for a volunteer thing, I feel like someone else is watching my kids. Mom=guilt
G
p.s.
right now I am guilty hiding from four stinky boys!!! I couldn't escape the dog, but 4 out of five isn't bad!
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