Apathetic mama

I wasn't exactly a gold star mama today. Q woke up crying very early this morning, and T got up with him. I went downstairs after a few minutes, and we both worked on soothing him. Q is still not quite himself but much better than the last few days.

After awhile, I went back upstairs and climbed into bed with two warm cats. My favorite place to be. I rested a little while longer but could not drag myself out of bed when T was ready to go to work. I drifted in and out of sleep while Q trashed the room. He pulled down T's clock radio and turned it on, knocked over the lamp, tossed toys around, and pulled T's bookmark out of his book. At least most of his destruction was aimed at T's stuff.

I must admit, it felt pretty nice to get a little extra rest, but I did not exactly feel like mom of the year when I finally dragged myself out of bed and witnessed Q sitting amidst his destruction. Some days I am a supermom, taking Q to play dates, making him a wonderful nutritious lunch, and playing educational games. Other days, like today, I am a pretty apathetic mama. Yet, it doesn't seem like other moms have these lapses.

I feel guilty about it, but then I don't know how to get around it when I am so tired early in the morning, and I know I have to keep going till midnight. I know it is only going to get worse when the second child arrives. Maybe I won't let him come out. He can just stay inside my belly and live and give me an excuse to eat ice cream and not lift heavy things. That could work!

--MM